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Colorado head coach Deion Sanders before the game against the Arizona Wildcats at Folsom Field November 11, 2023. (Photo by Andy Cross/The Denver Post)
Colorado head coach Deion Sanders before the game against the Arizona Wildcats at Folsom Field November 11, 2023. (Photo by Andy Cross/The Denver Post)
DENVER, CO - NOVEMBER 8:  Sean Keeler - Staff portraits at the Denver Post studio.  (Photo by Eric Lutzens/The Denver Post)
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BOULDER — Shedeur Sanders may be a Rolls-Royce quarterback. But he ain’t going anywhere for the Buffs until CU lands him an Oldsmobile.

“I’m bringing in an old Oldsmobile in the summer. And they’re going to be pushing that thing up and around the field … I’ve done it before, because it does teach you to drive that knee through the defender. So whatever I’ve got to do, I’ll do it.”

So said our old pal Chris Kapilovic, five springs ago.

Remember Coach Kap? Mel Tucker Era. Blink and you missed him.

And, oh, how the Buffs have missed him.

Kap, Tucker’s offensive line coach, told amazing stories. He had his players push an ancient Oldsmobile around during workouts. He’s reportedly making $1.08 million this fall at Michigan State, where the program just happens to be in the middle of a regime change after Tucker’s icky off-field exploits came to light.

Kapilovic’s contemporary at CU, Bill O’Boyle, is making $300,000. O’Boyle’s slated to make $350,000 next season. Assuming there is a next season for him here, and you can already kinda do the math on that one.

The Buffs lost prep offensive line recruit Talan Chandler to Missouri this past weekend, which didn’t exactly soothe that 42-point hurt Wazzu put on CU in Pullman last Friday night.

When asked about Chandler’s flip Tuesday, Buffs football coach Deion Sanders pointed fingers … and a thumb. Maybe two.

“We’re not going to buy anybody whatsoever,” Coach Prime said. “That’s how we approach it.

“We have tremendous needs. I’m pretty sure everybody in the country knows what we need and how much we need it. That’s not a secret. Recruits are responding.”

You want to get offensive line recruits to respond, coach?

If you’re not going to give the bag to big-time blockers up front, better start pooling those nickels for a big-time offensive line coach.

A guru who stud tackles want to play for.

Somebody who sends guys to the league.

As of Tuesday afternoon, the Buffs had one offensive line commitment on their punch card — Issiah Walker Jr. out of Butler (Kan.) Community College. It’s not for lack of trying: Per 247Sports.com, they have 46 offensive line offers out to kids in the Class of 2024. They’ve got 24 offensive line offers out for 2025. They had 55 offers out in ’23; 54 in ’22; 47 in ’21.

O’Boyle’s a nice guy. Straight-shooter. But Kent State, O’Boyle’s prior stop, hasn’t had a lineman drafted since 2013, or five years before he showed up from South Dakota. Kap, meanwhile, has seen six of his former linemen drafted over the last decade, including CU’s Arlington Hambright by the Bears in 2020.

“We’re not an ATM,” Prime continued. “That’s not gonna happen here. If you come to CU to play football for me and the CU Buffaloes, (it’s) because you really want to play football and receive a wonderful education. And all the business stuff is going to be handled on the back end, if that’s the case.

“But we are not an ATM. You’re not coming here to get rich unless you really come here with a plan to go to the NFL and get your degree. Not to come here and be (rapper) Moneybagg Yo.”

Yo, Coach Prime? You might want to check out the list Football Scoop put together this spring.

The site compiled a list of the highest-paid offensive line coaches in the FBS, including those who also serve as their respective program’s offensive coordinators.

Fun fact: Coach Kap tied for first with Justin Frye of Ohio State among guys who are offensive-line only. Utah’s Jim Harding landed in the middle of that list, at $650,000 per year. Our favorite all-time dude, ex-CSU coach Steve “Sunshine” Addazio, checked in at No. 20, with $529,000 from Texas A&M.

(Daz’s Aggies are also in the middle of a coaching search. I have this nightmare in which Prime decides to troll CSU fans, to get ’em back for the Travis Hunter hit, by hiring Addazio and trotting him around FoCo during the Rocky Mountain Showdown at Canvas Stadium.)

With the exception of Kap’s Spartans, who were torpedoed by Tucker before the season was three weeks old, the 20 programs on that list all have something in common besides investing in muscle.

They win.

A lot.

Of the teams in that group, only two — the aforementioned Spartans and Arkansas — are dragging a losing record into Thanksgiving/Rivalry Weekend. Take out Sparty, and the average ledger in that club is 8-3 with a game to play.

Or basically where Coach Prime wants this program to be, at the worst, a year from now. When it comes to offensive lines at this level, you get what you pay for. And nobody’s riding into the College Football Playoffs without some Rolls-Royce protection first.

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