Fireworks are a quintessential New Year’s Eve event, whether your plans include a raucous party or a chill gathering of friends. Only a couple of cities on the Front Range will be hosting fireworks this year, so they are bound to be prime attractions.

Or you could head to the mountains where many towns will be shooting fireworks off early to accommodate kids (and the cold). Most include a torchlight parade, in which skiers carry flares for a spectacular visual effect as they come down the mountain.

Join us as we count down the 10 best places to see New Year’s Eve fireworks in Colorado.

Downtown Denver

The 16th Street Mall (1001 16th St., Denver) will be the epicenter of the Mile High City’s New Year’s Eve celebrations, with a free, outdoor block party featuring multiple fireworks shows. At 9 p.m. and midnight, fireworks will illuminate the skyline and DJs along the promenade will play a soundtrack to the 8-minute show. Live music will continue between displays, too, for NYE revelers in the area.

Find more information at denver.org/event/new-years-eve-fireworks/108069/.

Parker

Douglas County celebrates New Year’s Eve with a fireworks-inspired drone show at EchoPark Stadium (11901 Newlin Gulch Blvd., Parker) starting at 7 p.m. Attendees will be able to watch from the parking lot and because no food or drinks will be for sale, they can also bring their own.

Find more information at douglas.co.us/event/new-years-eve-drone-show/.

Keystone

The best spots for viewing Keystone Resort’s NYE fireworks display, which starts at 7 p.m., will be at the base of River Run Gondola and River Run Village (100 Dercum Square, Keystone). That is, unless you choose to go night skiing, in which case you can take in the spectacle from the slopes.

Find more information at keystoneresort.com/explore-the-resort/activities-and-events/events-calendar.aspx.

Copper Mountain

Skiers celebrating the end of the year with laps at Copper Mountain can join a party in the Center Village (206 Ten Mile Circle, Frisco) that kicks off with a torchlight parade at 6 p.m. and ends with fireworks at 10 p.m. A DJ will spin tunes as vendors sell food and drinks at this free, family-friendly event.

Find more information at coppercolorado.com/things-to-do/events/december-events/new-years-eve-2023.

Vail

The Vail Ski and Snowboard School kicks off the NYE fun with a torchlight parade down Golden Peak (75 S. Frontage Road, West Vail), followed by fireworks that will be visible throughout the mountain town. The parade starts at 6:15 p.m. and fireworks start at 6:25 p.m.

Find more information at discovervail.com/event/new-years-eve-torchlight-parade-fireworks/.

Beaver Creek

The Winter Circus comes to Beaver Creek Village (26 Avondale Lane, Avon) to add a little wonder to this New Year’s Eve. The party starts with a 6 p.m. “ski down” the mountain, during which 200 skiers equipped with glowsticks will traverse the slopes down to the base where aerialists, contortionists, jugglers, break dancers, and fire dancers will be performing. Enjoy food and drinks until fireworks go off over Beaver Creek Mountain at 10 p.m.

Find more information beavercreek.com/explore-the-resort/activities/beaver-creek-events.aspx.

Aspen

Fireworks will illuminate the sky over Aspen Mountain at 8 p.m. on New Year’s Eve. Before the show, stop by the outdoor pedestrian mall in downtown (at the intersection of Mill Street and Cooper Avenue, Aspen) to enjoy music, firepits, hot chocolate and entertainment such as winter fairies and stilt walkers (noon to 3 p.m.). Or head to the Aspen Ice Garden and go ice skating for free from 3 to 6 p.m. (233 W. Hyman Ave., Aspen).

More information at aspenspecialevents.com/new-years-eve/.

Snowmass

So you’ve watched a torchlight parade, but have you ever participated in one? Snowmass invites intermediate skiers ages 8 and up to join its New Year’s Eve torchlight parade – no lift ticket required. The parade starts at 6 p.m. and cascades down Fanny Hill before a fireworks show at 10 p.m. To watch the festivities, head to the Snowmass Base Village (84 Carriage Way, Snowmass Village).

Find more information at gosnowmass.com/event/nye-torchlight-parade/.

Telluride

Dual torchlight parades will descend from the peak of Telluride Ski Resort down the mountains to the town center and to Mountain Village starting at 6:30 p.m. Fireworks follow the parades and visibility will be best from the Mountain Village core (670 Mountain Village Blvd., Mountain Village), which is also a public consumption area. That means you can grab a beer to-go from one of the bars to enjoy during the show.

Find more information at telluride.com/event/new-years-eve-torchlight-parade-fireworks/.

Steamboat Springs

Snowcats decorated with lights will help Steamboat Springs ring in 2024. The snowcat parade precedes a torchlight parade and fireworks to cap off the evening. The free event runs 5:30 to 6 p.m. at the base of the ski resort (2305 Mt. Werner Circle, Steamboat Springs).

Find more information at steamboat.com/things-to-do/events/new-years-eve-fireworks-and-light-up-snow-cat-parade.

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I have my own home, family, and job in my hometown. I’ve lived here for my entire life.

My SO and I have no plans to marry or live together.

Should we try a long-distance relationship, or break up now because our future plans don’t seem to include the other?

— Perplexed in the Midwest

Dear Perplexed: I sense in the subtext of your question that you might feel quite stung by what you perceive as your significant other’s choice not only to leave town, but to leave you.

So yes, you could preempt this still far-off choice by preparing to break up, or you could at least attempt a long-distance relationship by trying to visit one another on a loose schedule. If he lands in a nice spot, you might see this as each of you having something of a second home: a second destination to travel to when you want to.

Most important, however, is the need for each of you to communicate, honestly and frankly, about your future plans — both as individuals and as a couple.

Dear Amy: My husband and I have been married for several years. We’re really happy, with successful careers, a house we enjoy, and two dogs we love.

We honestly love our lives and are not sure about having children. We’re not ruling it out, but we’re also not ruling it in.

Lately my mother has been starting to pressure us. This started out subtly, but then the pressure seemed to grow until over Thanksgiving, when she actually said, out loud, “You owe me grandchildren.”

I was upset and have become more upset over time.

Can she possibly believe that?

What is the best way to react?

— Childfree

Dear Childfree: I can well imagine how this statement might have struck you.

At this point, because you continue to ruminate on it, you should find a way to express your concern to your mother.

I suggest writing down your thoughts and either sending her a letter or email, or just using your written down thoughts as a blueprint for a conversation.

To clarify what you already know: You do not owe it to anyone to have children.

You could ask your mother, “Do you really believe that I owe you grandchildren?” She might respond that no – she just really wants grandchildren.

She might believe that because she gave everything to you as you were growing up, that now it’s time for her to collect. Or maybe a lot of her friends are now experiencing grandparenthood, and she wants that, too.

Basically, you should patiently query her, listen carefully to her responses, and then lower the velvet boom: “Mom, you want what you want. And I want what I want. Pressuring me to have children for your sake is out of bounds. We may have children. We might not. But fulfilling your needs can’t be part of our decision-making, and I’d appreciate it if you understood that and respected this boundary.”

Dear Amy: On that pesky subject of tipping, here’s a situation I am wondering about.

When in a bakery where the customer goes to a counter, points to an item they want, an employee behind the counter puts the item in a bag, hands it to the customer, and handles the credit card transaction, is a tip expected now?

The credit card software now asks what tip the customer wants to leave, even when there’s no service rendered other than handing an item to a customer.

This can lead to embarrassment, as well as not wanting to frequent that bakery, any more — at least on my part.

Am I out of line? Have the tipping gods now decreed we must tip everyone?

What’s going on? It feels as though we are being shamed into tipping any time a credit card is used. What to do?

— Confused

Dear Confused: Back when we paid cash for most things, a bakery or coffee shop might have a tip cup on the counter where you could deposit the leftover change from your transaction if you chose to.

I agree that this automatic tip option does induce a feeling of pressure and I will run any responses from business owners explaining their reasoning.

You might start a “resist the tip!” movement.

(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)

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Taylor Swift, Ed Sheeran and Denver DJ-producer Illenium likely set records at Empower Field at Mile High, from the most tickets sold for a weekend run (Swift), to the biggest, venue-based concert in Denver history (Sheeran) and the biggest-ever show from a Colorado artist (Illenium).

As state and federal legislators again failed to pass meaningful legislation protecting consumers from outrageous ticketing fees, prices soared. A nosebleed seat to one of Swift’s shows at Empower Field may have cost less than $50 if you were lucky enough to get one during the disastrous Ticketmaster pre-sale. But thousands were forced to buy them on the secondary market for prices ranging from $500 to $10,000 per seat.

The Wall Street Journal found that the average price of a concert had doubled in the past five years, increasing from $125 in 2019 to $252 in 2023. The story was the same with re-sellers such as SeatGeek, whose resale averages doubled from the previous year to roughly the same price.

Those secondary-market tickets were also sold on sites like StubHub which, it should be noted, was forced to refund $3 million to more than 8,500 Colorado consumers in 2021 after the Colorado Attorney General’s Office found it wasn’t honoring its refund guarantees. Senate Bill 60 — a.k.a. Consumer Protection in Event Ticketing Sales Act — easily passed the state legislature, but was vetoed by Gov. Jared Polis in June because it could upset “the successful entertainment ecosystem in Colorado,” he said after killing it. Supporters vowed to revive it.

Local notes, some off-key

Denver strengthened its hold on electronic dance music, with artists, fans and promoters reinforcing the Mile High City as the global capital of the bass subgenre. Transplants such as French producer and DJ CloZee notched crucial headlining spots on the way to bigger, better appearances at venues such as Red Rocks Amphitheatre. Provided you were willing to align yourself with mega-promoter AEG Presents Rocky Mountains, the path from support act to Red Rocks headliner had never looked clearer.

Even as massive concerts continued at the 18,000-seat Fiddlers Green Amphitheatre, and heritage acts played their final Colorado shows (see Eagles, Dead & Company, Foreigner), festivals in metro Denver took a dip. The pause of this year’s Westword Music Showcase left a local music hole in June as the multi-venue event took the year off. Fortunately, South Broadway’s Underground Music Showcase got more equitable and community-oriented as it increasingly catered to all-ages, sober and BIPOC performers, such as the fast-ascending, R&B/hip-hop sensation N3PTUNE, amid a hundred-plus other acts.

The jazz world wobbled as Vail Jazz shut down after nearly than three decades, Denver Post jazz columnist Bret Saunders wrote. The free City Park Jazz series was also clipped by a series of June rainouts, denting its much-needed donations and attendance. The dearly departed El Chapultepec made a comeback of sorts with a legacy/archive project. The former owners sponsored shows at the nationally acclaimed Denver jazz club Dazzle — which itself reopened in a slick, more affordable space in downtown’s Performing Arts Complex. There, blockbuster Broadway musicals such as the jukebox-hit “Tina: The Tina Turner Musical” wowed audiences at the nearby Buell Theatre, drawing people to an urban core that’s still hollowed out from the pandemic.

Icons such as the historic Denver Folklore Center changed hands to an equally capable owner in Ian Dehmel, while nearby folk-music hub Swallow Hill welcomed a new concert director in music veteran David Dugan, just days after executive director Aengus Finnan finished out his first full year at the nonprofit.

Immersive entertainment company Meow Wolf, meanwhile, continued making good on its promise to support local artists with diverse, thoughtfully booked shows at the 488-person capacity Perplexiplex venue, from drag showcases to up-and-coming queer singer-songwriters.

Meow Wolf also brought back a slightly reworked Vortex music and art festival to Live Nation’s new-ish JunkYard outdoor venue. Smaller festivals and block parties mingled craft brews and local music favorites. The Colorado Music Hall of Fame inducted progressive bluegrass legend Yonder Mountain String Band, which celebrated the achievement at Telluride’s 50th anniversary bluegrass fest. Hazel Miller, Big Head Todd and the Monsters, and jazz pioneer George Morrison Sr. also got overdue spots in the state’s music hall. Alongside, jamgrass veteran The String Cheese Incident (already in the music hall as of 2022) celebrated its 30th anniversary of helping create and lead the genre.

Colorado Symphony dipped further into its pop collaborations with its Imagination Artist Series, which included not only local platinum-seller Nathaniel Rateliff but also a world premiere from Wu-Tang Clan’s RZA. (More were just announced with the same artists for 2024.)

But as venues and performers struggled to sustain comebacks in the face of cost-of-living and rent increases, every little bit of support made a difference. That included potentially career-changing shows at Levitt Pavilion Denver, which presented 50 free, quality concerts over the summer, and programs from the nonprofit Youth on Record and the state’s Take Note Colorado music education drive.

A garden of faceplants

In terms of national acts, Drake came up with perhaps the most lame excuse for a concert postponement in the history of Colorado music, blaming a last-minute ghosting on “the distance the road crew has to travel along with the magnitude of the production,” which made it “logistically impossible to bring the full experience of the show to Denver … .” The show was rescheduled for January at Ball Arena, with another date added, but one would’ve thought they figured out production details before putting tickets on sale and prompting more than 10,000 people to schedule their lives around it.

We also mourned the latest tour-dissing by Beyoncé, and wondered why current tours from Janet Jackson, Pearl Jam and Metallica snubbed Denver.

Bizarrely, and sadly, Royal Trux leader and indie rock veteran Neil Hagerty was charged with a trio of felonies in an alleged assault on a Denver police officer. The gloom also hung over some indie venues as HQ (formerly 3 Kings Tavern) flooded and closed after a devastating water break (it has since reopened), and workers at the Mercury Cafe — which hosts jazz, experimental music, poetry and comedy — pushed for a union after complaining of unsafe work conditions. Punk rock mainstay Carioca Cafe (a.k.a. Bar Bar) and Wax Trax Records grappled with the city over noise complaints and permits, while jam band Lotus and other acts lost crucial members to untimely deaths.

Broomfield’s troubled FirstBank Center shut down, and Loveland’s Budweiser Events Center announced a name change to Blue Arena. In Colorado Springs, the $55 million Sunset Amphitheater complex broke ground on its way to a planned June 2024 opening. And at a Louis Tomlinson show at Red Rocks in June, nearly 100 fans got cuts, bruises and broken bones after intense hail. Some concession stand workers reportedly laughed at them from their shelters, prompting calls for earlier storm warnings and more safety coverage at the city-owned venue. With climate change worsening, it seems to be just the tip of the extreme-weather risks for future outdoor concerts.

On the brighter side, salsa destination La Rumba marked its quarter-century milestone as Spanish-language concerts at venues ranging from Ball Arena to Levitt Pavilion and Aurora’s Stampede proliferated. That, along with supportive, sober and all-ages options, are a pair of trends we’d like to see continue into 2024.

Looking for a preview of the musical year ahead? Check out our updated list of 2024 Red Rocks concerts, plus music news, profiles and more at denverpost.com/tag/music.

And The Denver Post’s readers love to dig into those stories. This year, as always, skiing was one of the top topics of discussion, especially Epic Pass sales and a resort ranking. But hiking and camping were also big, especially when it came to Rocky Mountain National Park.

We also had an unusual sighting, literally, in our top 10. But we’ll let you see that for yourself. Here are our 10 most-read outdoor recreation stories of the year, with the number-one story at the end.

Bad drivers in the backcountry are a big problem

The sheriff in San Miguel County called a group of people who slid off Black Bear Pass in their truck “ass clowns,” which is funny. But the problem is real: More and more people, who lack skills or experience or proper maps, are driving on backcountry roads they can’t handle in Colorado — or simply ignoring closures — resulting in more rescues.

First-of-its-kind hiking permit proposed for Blue Lakes

The gorgeous Blue Lakes in the San Juan Mountains near Telluride have become so crowded in recent years that the U.S. Forest Service wants to require permits just to hike there during the day — as well as to camp. The goal of the plan, which would be the first in Colorado of its kind on forest service land, is to reduce the environmental impact of recreation.

Colorado’s oldest chairlift will be retired at age 70

Sunlight Mountain Resort’s Sunlight chairlift began its long life at Aspen in 1954 before being relocated in 1973. Since then, it has faithfully served skiers at Sunlight. The relic of ski history engineering is still safe, but is scheduled to be put out to pasture this spring.

High-alpine lake is one of Colorado’s most spectacular hikes

Nearly 2,500 feet below the summit of Long’s Peak in Rocky Mountain National Park is a beautiful alpine tarn called Chasm Lake. The 4.2 hike to get there is strenuous, but the steep rock walls soaring into the air above the water make it one of the most beautiful payoffs in Colorado.

Another hassle awaits Rocky Mountain National Park visitors

Rocky Mountain National Park has been feeling the heat. Not only will its busiest campground, Moraine Park, be closed into this summer (see below), but visitation continues to soar, resulting in what will likely be a permanent ticketing system. To make things worse, one of its two Estes Park-area entrances, Fall River, was under construction all summer and fall.

Epic Pass prices increase, early bird on sale for 2023-24 season

Vail Resorts announced its early bird prices in March for this season’s Epic Passes — and Denver Post readers wanted to know all about it. Of course they did. The pass, which includes Vail, Beaver Creek, Keystone, Breckenridge and Crested Butte, is one of the hottest items in Colorado. so the costs, the on-sale dates and every other detail is big news.

Colorado ski resort named the best in North America by website

Magazines, newspapers and websites love to rank things, including ski resorts, and since Colorado has some of the best in the world, they often end up on lists. In March, readers of OnTheSnow, a website, voted Steamboat as North America’s best overall resort.

Campground closure at RMNP could have ripple effect across Colorado

Rocky Mountain National Park’s largest campground, the immensely popular Moraine Park, shut down last summer so it could undergo a major modernization project, meaning 244 fewer sites in the area. That figured to put more pressure on nearby campgrounds in the adjacent and already overloaded national forests. The campground will hopefully reopen in June 2024.

Coloradans may see Northern Lights more often in coming months

Seeing the Aurora Borealis, or Northern Lights, is on a lot of people’s bucket lists. So, how cool would it be to be able to see them from Colorado rather than having to travel to the Arctic? Space weather predictors say there is more of a possibility of that happening in 2024 with increasing solar storm activity — something that happens in an 11-year cycle.

Bigfoot may have been caught on camera from Durango train

In October, a Wyoming couple was looking for elk while riding the Durango & Silverton Narrow Gauge Railroad in southwest Colorado when they spotted, well, something that looked like Bigfoot. The story made national news after a video taken by another passenger went viral online. Was it really the famed but elusive cryptid? We’ll let you judge for yourself. See our story, with video, here.

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Travel guides, transplants (and even this publication) have plenty of thoughts about Colorado’s best pizza places. I’m a transplant, too, and have fallen in love over the years with local favorites ranging from Beau Jo’s honeyed crust to Cart-Driver’s wood-fired pie.

Related: 11 of the best pizza joints in and around Denver

But having arrived here 23 years ago from Dayton, Ohio — a city that’s no slouch when it comes to pizza — I’ve become dependent on a Denver shop that feels positively old-school compared to the new class of local pie-slingers.

Since 1996, Enzo’s End Pizzeria has been a comforting anchor on the semi-gentrified stretch of East Colfax Avenue between Colorado Boulevard and York Street, where pedestrian traffic is fairly constant. Its red, thatched shingles and vinyl-booth dining room share space (and an interior door) with the also excellent, also old-school PS Lounge.

Tipplers at that bar can order pizzas from Enzo’s while they hang at PS — itself a cash-only classic where women get free roses upon entering, and everyone gets a free shot of the (admittedly weak) Alabama Slammer.

I don’t drink alcohol anymore, but I do have many fond and blurry memories of digging into a New York-style, thin-crust pie from Enzo’s during nights out. Fortunately, Enzo’s stands alone. Its clean-finishing, toothsome crust and 30 high-quality toppings (the usuals, but also garlic chicken and sautéed spinach) are brought together with mozzarella that is lactose-free.

As my food-writer wife informed me, there are various reasons why cheeses tend to lose their lactose (in the production process, as they age, etc.). But Enzo’s version has always had an ideal mix of gooey and giving and savory, concealing a tart and perfectly applied sauce with garden-fresh tomato flavor.

A 12-inch small ‘za costs $18 before toppings, so it’s definitely not cheap. But do you always want the cheapest pizza available? With a refund guarantee and a tasty side salad, there’s little risk in eating Enzo’s. The reward, however, is immediate and lasting.

Enzo’s End Pizzeria. New York-style thin-crust pies. For dine-in, takeout and delivery; closed Mondays and Tuesdays. 3424 E. Colfax Ave. enzosend.com or 303-355-4700

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His two reading teachers have said that he is disrespectful and does not participate enough in class.

We have talked about this — both with the teachers and with him.

He comes home with complete papers, does well on spelling tests and is above grade level on reading assessments.

What they say and what we see coming home doesn’t make sense.

We have asked for examples of situations when he’s disrespectful so we can talk to him about it, but the teachers become vague and won’t give an example.

His other teachers say he is kind and helpful, while also being a bit too talkative, but they say he is on track and doing well.

We want to help solve the issue with his reading teachers, but can’t seem to get straight answers.

He comes home crying sometimes because his reading teachers seem to react so negatively to him.

He’s a good kid (an only child) and we don’t feel he’s disrespectful at home.

He is very creative, artistic, and generally a happy and easygoing boy.

Any advice on how to tackle this?

My mother-in-law says to just let it go because he’s fine, but I don’t know.

I’m worried that I’m just not seeing something, and this is uncharted territory for me.

— Uncharted

Dear Uncharted: Your son’s teachers are telling you that your son has problems — or creates problems — in their classroom.

Without details or examples, you don’t have any way to coach your son toward improved behavior. It is ironic (to say the least) that his reading teachers communicate so poorly.

You should start by emailing both of the teachers. Thank them for teaching your son and explain simply and briefly that you are eager to help resolve some of the issues they’ve raised. You might engage them more thoroughly if you basically throw yourself on their mercy by adding something like, “We are first-time parents and he is our only child, so we don’t have any prior experience dealing with educational or learning problems. We really want to help him succeed, so please detail very plainly and specifically any behavior which you believe needs correction. We welcome your specific suggestions and guidance for how to help him to be the respectful and engaged pupil you deserve to teach.”

After this blatant appeal for help, you should also kick this issue upstairs to the academic counselor and/or principal. Meeting personally with these educators would help to give you a game plan, and it could also put the school administration on notice that these particular teachers are not necessarily setting your son up for success in school.

This is a critical stage for your son. He could emerge as a lively little boy who is excited to learn, or a frustrated child who doesn’t like going to school.

Dear Amy: I picked up my husband’s phone and found a private message to a woman he works with.

It started out “Hey, Beautiful.”

I looked up her profile on Facebook and under pictures she has posted of herself he was saying things like “absolutely gorgeous” and “beautiful.”

He had surgery and we both posted about the surgery on FB, but she messaged privately to ask him how it went.

I say she could have read it like everyone else and apparently she did because she left a heart emoji on his post.

He says this is all perfectly innocent and there is nothing wrong with it.

I say there is a lot wrong with it.

What do you say?

— Disgruntled Wife

Dear Disgruntled: I wonder how your husband would react if you were engaged in an analogous private communication with another man whom your husband had never met: “Hey, gorgeous!” “Hey, handsome!” “Hubba hubba…”

What matters most is not whether it is “wrong,” “innocent,” or somewhere in between, but how this makes you feel.

I suggest that you should discuss this, not by labeling the behavior, but by describing your feelings.

Dear Amy: Your advice to “Regretful” was backward. This older couple moved across the country to be with their children, and when they decided they’d made a mistake and moved back, you sided with their children!

— Upset

Dear Upset: “Regretful” made a hasty choice to move, and quickly reversed course. I appreciated that they took responsibility for the impact of their “pandemic panic.”

(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)

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In my freshman year, I made friends with “Ruby.”

Over time I came to understand that I needed to end the friendship due to Ruby’s troubling behavior toward others and with me.

Now, two years later, I have a new friend, “Sammie,” who is also friends with Ruby.

I only hang out with Sammie when Ruby is not present.

On several occasions when I was talking with Sammie, Ruby joined the conversation.

I was cordial, but I tried to limit my contact.

Now, when I see Ruby in the hall at school, Ruby waves enthusiastically and calls my name excitedly.

I don’t want any contact with Ruby. I don’t want any association with this person’s bad actions, including occasionally being violent.

I don’t want to confront Ruby to say I’m not interested in friendship, but Ruby keeps making attempts, suggesting renewing the friendship.

How can I gently distance myself from Ruby without causing conflict or hurting this person’s feelings?

— Desperate for Distance

Dear Desperate: I think that you should continue along the careful course you’ve already set. Be polite, non-committal, and avoidant.

Ruby might have changed somewhat during the many months you’ve successfully been distant, and while you should stay open to that possibility, you should not hang out with someone — anyone — who makes you uncomfortable.

If Ruby confronts you about your distance, you might say something like, “I’m just hanging back, like usual.”

Don’t let yourself be drawn in. You don’t need to answer loaded questions. Just be quiet and polite.

You don’t seem to have discussed Ruby with “Sammie” in any depth, and I also think this is wise, although I caution you that if Ruby hasn’t really changed, Sammie might be drawn into a friendship drama-triangle with Ruby at one point, Sammie at another, and you at the third.

You might wonder if Sammie is making the right choice regarding a friendship with this challenging person, but that friendship decision should be up to Sammie.

All of this is a reminder of what a social mine-field high school can be, but you seem well-equipped to handle these challenges.

If you were in my class, I’d give you extra-credit for being both sensitive and smart.

Dear Amy: I am in my mid-30s. Over the last 10 years, my life has changed significantly.

I’m married now and my husband and I have two children.

I’ve been struggling a bit lately with looking way down the road.

I used to be this very adventurous person. I was more or less up for anything. I’d describe myself as almost daring and unconventional.

Yesterday my husband and I had a lengthy (and I mean lengthy) conversation about granite countertops.

Our kids are three and five years old. Our world revolves around them, other families with children their ages, our jobs, and our house.

I find myself wondering what happened to us and wondering how we can fix it.

— Safe but not Sound

Dear Safe: First of all, even though you are deep into the wooliest part of your family life, you possess enough perspective to remember your earlier self with fondness — and you want to reclaim access to that person and those feelings.

Some people dive into the granite conversation, and they stay there, forever, locked into choices and actions that are ultimately superficial.

My first suggestion is that you might consider the perspective that raising children at this stage is actually loaded with tiny adventures and some big challenges. You and your husband are scaling small mountains every day.

Second, I think that you two should leave your children, and your home environment, for a weekend. Two whole days.

While away, you should rest, relax, and make a determination to look at your larger life-goals. Reach for the sky and write down your list.

You want more adventure: what are some ways you can get that as individuals, as a couple, and as a family?

How can you raise your children to be free, brave, and bold souls?

When you’re young, adventure has a way of finding you.

When you’re older, you have to deliberately seek it. I hope you will.

Dear Amy: I thought your advice to “Wondering” was completely hysterical. Wondering was concerned about her boyfriend’s super-close relationship to his sister. You interpreted this as a “threat.”

Give me a break!

— Dismayed

Dear Dismayed: “Wondering” already felt threatened by the relationship, and then the sister seemed to deliver an actual threat. I thought it was wisest to walk away.

(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)

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I have never said no to anyone and have always been gracious to anyone staying in our home, but I find I really don’t enjoy it.

I have extreme stress and anxiety days before they arrive, and also while they are here.

My husband doesn’t understand my tirades over this. He welcomes anyone who wants to stay with us.

I just don’t like people here with us 24 hours a day. I like my privacy at night to rest and read or watch television, and the last thing I want is to see faces at the breakfast table when I get up in the morning.

I know this issue will be coming up soon again as one recent guest has already said he plans to be back in town early next year.

Houseguests unsettle me, my lack of privacy is the issue, although I make sure they would never guess how I feel.

I am tired of pretending it is fine that they are staying with us.

How can I suggest that a hotel is a better choice when they ask to stay?

I don’t want to offend anyone, but my mental health is more important to me than sharing my home with out-of-towners.

How do I nicely say sorry, but no?

— Not Saying No

Dear Not Saying: Saying “no” firmly but kindly is an act of clarifying grace and, in your case, essential self-care.

Your husband is the X-factor here, because he chooses not to recognize your extreme challenge, and then undermines you by being an automatic “yes” man.

His behavior is supremely unfair to you, but if you are pretending that everything is OK during a visit, he may believe that you ultimately enjoy hosting.

The first person you need to learn to say “no” to is the man you are sharing your home with. Your pre-visit “tirades” brought on by stress don’t seem to have impressed him.

You could practice a “no” with these next self-invited guests: “You mentioned wanting to visit, but I’m finding it very hard to host lately, so hosting you in our home won’t be possible. I’ve found a number of nearby places you could look at to stay, and I’d be really happy to spend time with you during your time in town.”

If you can’t bring yourself to either confront your husband about this or manage an emailed “no,” you will land with people at your breakfast table.

Perhaps you should consider them to be essentially your husband’s guests.

If so, you could either choose to stay elsewhere, or protect your privacy by spending as much time as possible alone, especially at both ends of the day. This is a change in your expected behavior, but — you must calmly and carefully take care of yourself.

Dear Amy: My husband and I frequently go out for dinner with my brother and sister-in-law.

Sometimes her sister and husband will join us.

They are all drinkers, and we are not. (They usually have more than one drink).

I don’t think it is fair that we pay for their alcohol every time we go out, but my husband and I both feel awkward asking for a separate check.

I did ask once for them to buy their drinks before being seated, but that idea didn’t fly.

Would love your thoughts on this sensitive issue.

— Non-Drinker

Dear Non-Drinker: This isn’t really that sensitive an issue, and you should not shy away from stating your own need and desire to go out, enjoy a meal, and pay for your meal separately.

If the other two couples want to co-mingle their charges and split the cost down the middle, that’s up to them.

You can ask the server directly: “Could you prepare a separate check for the two of us?”

There is no need to dive into the awkwardness or explain this to the other diners. Your friends should accept your choice, resume ordering their meals, and not give it another thought.

Dear Amy: “Exhausted Daughter” did not understand her mother’s life-long emotional distance. Thank you for suggesting that this daughter do some research about neurodivergence.

I faced an analogous situation and receiving a diagnosis really helped everyone to understand that this behavior was not intended as a personal response.

— Been There

Dear Been There: I hope “Exhausted Daughter” can also receive some helpful insight.

(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)

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But the arrival of King Henry VIII’s six wives to the Buell Theater (through Dec. 24) is proof that the whole can be greater than the sum of its parts.

In what can be considered one of the best concerts of Denver’s fall season, Toby Marlow and Lucy Moss’s blast-from-a-past, her-story lesson brings together Catherine of Aragon (Gerianne Pérez), Anne Boleyn (Zan Berube), Jane Seymour (Amina Faye), Anne of Cleves (Terica Marie), Katherine Howard (Aline Mayagoitia)  and Catherine Parr (Adriana Scalice) for a rock show. Or, as the opening song “Ex-Wives” so deftly and drolly introduces the sextet: “Divorced. Beheaded, Died … Divorced. Beheaded. Survived.”

The premise is simple, and seeks the participation of theatergoers. “Den-vvverrr! Make some noise!” Aragon shouts before launching into “No Way.” Although each woman was queen at some point, the audience is invited to decide which queen should don the evening’s crown. The ex with the best sob story wins. Naturally, Anne Boleyn, who infamously met her end due to the executioner’s blade, would seem to have a head start (pun intended). Throughout the show and in the “Don’t Lose Ur Head,” portrayer Zan Berube, with a quirky zest that calls forth Margot Robbie’s Harley Quinn, reminds us of that outrageous fate.

Over the next 80 minutes, each woman seeks to persuade the audience with numbers that are consistently winking, sometimes wise and biographically apt. There’s even a ballad. With show-stopping chops, Amina Faye as Jane Seymour — the one who was actually loved by VIII, who died shortly after the birth of son Edward — sings “Heart of Stone,” a tune that suggests that even for her, there was more to her story than the historical record captured.

Given the patriarchal vibe of the time (the Tudor past but also the #MeToo-ish present), the musical — with its (Spice) girl-power feminism — argues there was cause for hurt, outrage, even fear aplenty. But is this competition in misery the best way of going about historical comeuppance? “Six” asks, toys with and then answers that quandary.

As with a proper rock show, there’s a live band, directed here by Jane Cardona. And this being a work honoring queens, the nimble players — on keyboards, guitar, bass and drums — are the Ladies in Waiting.

The wild set (Emma Bailey) suggests a concert venue, one that allows for some measure of intimacy. Think the Fillmore, not Ball Arena. For Anne of Cleves and her tartly delivered tune “Haus of Holbein,” the action heads to Germany.  From start to encore, the light show (designed by Tim Deiling) plays off that conceit: twirling beams of light whirl; the dark, strobe-y energy of a dance club serving up electronica beckons; a cross, etched in glowing light bulbs, signifies piety with an attitude.

There are willfully LOL moments, intent on capturing the attention of the LOL generations. Cleves’s refrain of “I didn’t look like my profile picture” underscores who this lesson in European history aims for. Ditto its brevity.

Feminism lite, perhaps. Theater lite, maybe. This isn’t the sort of musical that bursts forth into song because regular dramatic language can’t contain the emotions. These are songs as biographical sketches, setting the record straight as pop confections.

For some theatergoers, the show might revive a familiar sticking point: Women who claim feeling sexy as a right and a pleasure often look like they’re delivering a mixed message when it comes to female empowerment. Just ask Queen Bey (a different monarch who gets a nod here) or the other pop figures the playbill tags as “Queenspiration,” among them: Adele, Avril Lavigne, Shakira, Britney Spears, Nicki Minaj and Alicia Keys.

Doubters will have to chew on the vivaciously delivered (it’s complicated) “All You Wanna Do,” by VIII”s other murdered mate, Katherine Howard (Mayagoitia). Or pay specific heed to Catherine Parr’s anthemic “I Don’t Need Your Love,” to rightly complicate matters — which makes this fleet, seemingly frothy show a perfectly spiked treat for a holiday month.

Lisa Kennedy is a Denver freelance writer who specializes in film and theater. 

IF YOU GO

“Six”: Written by Toby Marlow and Lucy Moss. Directed by Moss and Jamie Armitage. Choreography by Carrie-Anne Ingrouille. Featuring Gerianne Pérez, Zan Berube, Amina Faye, Terica Marie, Aline Mayagoitia and Adriana Scalice. The Ladies in Waiting: Jane Cardona, Sterlyn Termine, Rose Laguana and Kami Lujan.  At the Buell Theatre, 14th and Curtis streets. Through Dec. 24. For tickets and info: denvercenter.com or 303-893-4100.

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I have been giving — really extending — the benefit of the doubt to “Jan,” my daughter-in-law, for some time.

I see my son and Jan a couple of times a year, when I visit their city.

I get a hotel room willingly and without question. I am friendly and supportive, I compliment her sincerely, and I find positive, non-controversial things to talk about.

She just doesn’t seem to like me — or my visits — and it clearly hurts and upsets my son.

She is openly impatient with him and absolutely cold to me.

I can do nothing right. It would be nice if we could be friends, but if that’s too much I would be OK with being simply polite.

I am bewildered and hurt for my son.

I know that he is courteous and welcoming to her parents.

I don’t know what I have done, if anything.

Should I ask if I’ve offended her somehow?

I don’t want to cause a kerfuffle for my son, but I think that maybe I trigger difficulty between them for reasons I’m unsure of.

This is not improving with time (it’s been four years, now).

I can no longer pretend that I don’t notice, and I am wondering what you think I should do.

— Somebody’s Mom

Dear Mom: You have done your best to basically put your head down and endure this, politely — hoping, no doubt, that “Jan’s” attitude toward you would change as time went on and she discovered that you are a benign, low-impact presence in her family’s life.

You don’t seem to have asked your son what challenges he and his wife are facing. She could struggle with extreme anxiety, depression, or another mental or physical health challenge that neither of them has chosen to disclose to you.

So I would start with your son. Ask him, “Are there things I could or should do to make things easier for you and Jan when I visit?”

Based on how your son answers, you could open up and share your own questions, concerns and challenges.

Based on the vibe during your next visit, I suggest speaking with Jan privately, asking her a version of the questions you’ve asked your son. Tell her that you don’t want to burden either of them, but that you are worried that she seems stressed when she sees you.

In short, nudge the door open and give her space to walk through.

Dear Amy: I’ve lived in my home for five years.

There is a very large tree in the backyard.

At this time of year, the leaves obviously fall to the ground in both my yard and my neighbor’s yard.

My neighbors have asked me to give them money to clean the leaves from their yard.

We are both homeowners, and in my opinion, homeowners sign up for the responsibility of maintaining our home and yard when we buy the home.

My neighbors on the other side of my house have leaves that fall into my yard and I would never assume it is their responsibility to clean the leaves that fall onto my property.

I am at a loss because this is not the first time my neighbors have asked about this.

In previous years I have said “no,” and yet they keep asking.

I don’t want to start a precedent of giving them money every year, but I don’t want to be argumentative.

Any suggestions?

— Leave the Leaves?

Dear Leave: Please remember that anyone can ask anything.

Asking can be very easy.

“No” can require a flash of courage, and sometimes a bit of finesse.

You are not responsible for the leaves that have fallen in your neighbor’s yard. (Double check your local laws and statutes.)

And now, after five years of saying “no,” in my opinion you no longer need to respond at all.

There is no need to respond again. Let your “no” precedent remain, like that last stubborn oak leaf clinging to its branch.

Dear Amy: Your response to “First-time Grandparents” was inadequate, to say the least. Their daughter-in-law’s parents had behaved abusively toward them, by berating them publicly.

Their son and daughter-in-law need to confront her parents about their inappropriate behavior and strongly suggest an apology to the injured parties.

To do less is just asking for the wound to fester.

— Upset

Dear Upset: You make a good point, but because these other in-laws were so volatile and explosive, I worried that confronting them might make matters worse.

(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)

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